That's Just The Way Life Goes
by CrazycheeseCake
Summary: WIP NEW Chapter 9 FINALLY! Harry finally realises he’s not just a pawn in Dumbledore’s game – but neither is he a pawn of Voldemort’s. What he does control is his own life. Please read and reply! Greatly appreciated! :-)
1. Chapter 1: There's one in every family

**_Disclaimer:_**_ OK, I say this now. I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER AND HIS UNIVERSE. All is J.K Rowlings. I'm only borrowing them for now – imprisoning them in little jars and controlling their every move. But don't worry I did put air holes in the jars... well not many in Voldemorts.... but a lot in Sevvies – coz he's lovely and I love him! Ummmm Snape on a stick...Yummy._

**_Summary:_**_ Dark!Harry. (Slytherin)Harry finally realises he's not just a pawn in Dumbledore's game – but neither is he a pawn of Voldemort's. What he does control is his own life. He gets new friends, alliances and mentors, including finding a trusted friend and counsel in Professor Snape._

The first chapter there is mentions of abuse and rape. However this is not graphic. But that is the reason the fic is labelled 'R'. Any problems do not hesitate to contact me.

**_Pairing:_**_ Definitely a Harry and Snape mentoring thing. But should it be more father/son, mentor/student, or romance??? Not sure._

_DM/HG – much later on though. Gotta get things established first haven't I?!? Hehe_

_I need a BETA since no one has volunteered yet – even though I asked for help in my other fic (**I don't wanna miss a thing** – please read it by the way!). So if you wanna be my BETA for this story – E-mail me at **cleld001@medway.org.uk**__. Or check my profile where there is my other address. I would really appreciate the help. Therefore this chapter hasn't been BETAed so my apologies for any stupid mistakes. I do check, but everyone misses glaringly stupid things now and then._

Sorry it's kind of short but I didn't want to write too much without any help and since this idea just hit me like a bolt of lightening, I didn't want to give too much away at the beginning. **Ideas and suggestions welcome!!**

Anyway on with the story – I hope you all like it!! Please review otherwise I may not continue!! Haha – threats and bribery – loadsa fun!! xxx

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_That's Just The Way Life Goes._

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**Chapter 1: There's one in every family.**

Harry potter, 'The boy who lived' sat on his bed. He was once again in his cupboard after another one of his punishments from his uncle. Following the summer from his fourth year Harry's 'punishments' were getting more frequent. Vernon hadn't taken the news of the death of Cedric very well and so was therefore constantly reminding his nephew that he was a murderer. Not only had that been happening but also his uncle heard about the attacks, courtesy of Voldemort and his minions and therefore took great pleasure is reminding his nephew that, once again, this was his entire fault.

Vernon had also recruited Dudley into his 'little games' while Petunia basically ignored Harry. She neither took part in the in the abuse but neither did she try to stop it. Which in many ways is worse – it is one thing to carry out the abuse but to watch and have the power to stop it, but no do so, it nothing shorter than sadistic.

As he sat on his bed trying to ignore the throbbing in his right arm and the pounding in his head, different thoughts were swimming around his head. As far as he could tell it was early August. He knew that it was after his birthday, after all Vernon and Dudley had given him such a 'thoughtful' present. They had both raped him – with no protection or no lubrication, taking great pleasure in his screams. He was a virgin Goddammit. Harry didn't remember much, he had passed out after ten minutes, but he new that they had continued – even when he was unconscious, and the blood was a dead giveaway.

"I need to get out of this house." He spoke vehemently into the silence. 

He had tried to take his life three days ago and didn't succeed. He knew that he didn't really want to die, but much longer at Privet Drive and death would be heaven. He needed out of that house, out of his own personal hell. He knew that he could make it to Diagon Alley pretty easily, a plan much like he had done during the summer before his third year. But he knew that the old bastard Dumbledore would try and stop him. Oh yes he realised now what Dumbledore really was, what he is really like. Not only is he a manipulative old man, but also extremely selfish, he would stop at nothing to get his own way. Almost as bad a Voldemort in some ways. Both have power and both know how to use it – it was no surprise really that Voldemort feared Dumbledore so much.

Because you see, Voldemort was still not destroyed – quite the opposite actually. He was growing more and more powerful by the day, collecting as many followers as he was victims. The Order of the Phoenix was set-up, of which Dumbledore was head of, and Harry himself a member. The Order acted as the main opposition to Voldemort and the Wizarding world's main chance of survival. Thanks to Arthur and select others, Fudge believed that Voldemort had indeed come back. Of course he was no longer Minister of Magic; after all it's not a good thing to have a Death Eater in power. The Wizarding World didn't particularly want to Dictator.

Harry drew himself up and picked the lock to the bolts of his cupboard. He had another – he didn't care what Voldemort did, he didn't care what Dumbledore did. All he knew right now was that he needed to get out of his hell. He had a plan – he would stay at the Leaky Cauldron for the rest of the summer. However not before, he called Social Services and got the Dursley family arrested. He had left enough evidence at their house to have them put away for a very long time. Of course he would remain totally anonymous, he would only give the details and the proof. Harry was no longer going to take a backseat in his life. For as long as he had lived he was always being told what to do, being manipulated, belittled, bullied and abused. Harry was powerful and he knew it, it could be an extremely scary enemy to either sides of this War. Of course he would never join with Voldemort, but neither would he blindly follow orders like in the past. He had to grow up quickly in his short life and adapt to different societies and places rapidly, but he had learnt on the way. And starting from this moment in his life, he was going to use his knowledge.

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End Chapter 1. Hope you like. Remember to review – PLEASE!!! PRESS THE LITTLE BUTTON LABELLED 'GO'!!


	2. Chapter 2: Confidence and Paranoia

**_Disclaimer:_**_ OK, I say this now. I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER AND HIS UNIVERSE. All is J.K Rowlings. I'm only borrowing them for now – imprisoning them in little jars and controlling their every move. But don't worry I did put air holes in the jars... well not many in Voldemorts.... but a lot in Sevvies – coz he's lovely and I love him! Ummmm Snape on a stick...Yummy.___

**_Summary:_**_ Dark!Harry. (Slytherin)Harry finally realises he's not just a pawn in Dumbledore's game – but neither is he a pawn of Voldemort's. What he does control is his own life. He gets new friends, alliances and mentors, including finding a trusted friend and counsel in Professor Snape.___

**_Pairing:_**_ Definitely a Harry and Snape mentoring thing. But should it be more father/son, mentor/student, or romance??? Not sure.___

_DM/HG – much later on though. Gotta get things established first haven't I?!? Hehe___

_Wow 11 reviews for the first chapter – I love them all!! Thank you so much and plz continue to review So I know how much ya love me! Hehe! __Anyway on with the story – I hope you all like it!! Please review otherwise I may not continue!! Haha – threats and bribery – loadsa fun!! xxx___ _Thank you sooooo much to Erin who BETAed this chapter for me!! __J___

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**Chapter 2: Confidence and Paranoia**

Harry crawled quietly out of the Cupboard, that when you look back into from the outside seemed like a black abyss, sucking in its victims; tearing apart their souls and intruding in on their thoughts – unleashing the hatred, guilt and evil from within. That is what Harry had always associated with that cupboard, ever since he had learned that living in a cupboard was not normal. Every time he went in there, he was a victim to his own mind, both his paranoia and confidence. Paranoia won every battle of thought. Harry whilst on his hands and knees looked at the vortex, mesmerized by its depth. He had lived and slept in that Cupboard for what seemed like an eternity; it was his cell, his tormenter.

Finally he tore himself away and turned around. From the beginning of the summer prior to his fifth year he had kept a journal of his life at 4 Privet Drive. He had duplicated the first copy so that he had two. He planned to take one copy with him and leave the other safely stowed away in the Cupboard – along with other evidence. The Dursleys were going to pay. A smirk formed on his face, clouding a face, which usually held happiness; with hatred and loathing. A look promising revenge. He wasn't fool enough to believe that Social Services would take much action with only with one diary so he placed the last piece of evidence under the pillow and left the black abyss, his hell and his past. Harry got to the telephone and dialled the number he had managed to find from the yellow pages and left a message for whoever was in charge, telling them the information and his contact details if vitally needed. What he did make clear was his want to remain anonymous. Once he replaced the receiver, Harry shrunk his belongings using his wand. The ministry had granted him permission to use magic outside of school due to the threat of Voldemort and Harry's constant need to practice his magic. 'What stupid idiotic fools' he thought to himself. 'They have no idea what they've done.'

Harry walked out of the house and didn't look back, his belongings in his overly large trouser pocket. Taking out his wand he signalled for the Knight Bus. There was a deafening BANG as the blinding light of the Knight Bus screeched to a halt exactly where Harry was standing. The conductor, Stan, who Harry recognized from his third summer adventure, leapt out of the bus and introduced himself.

"My name is Stan Shunpike, and I will be your conductor this evening –"He stopped quickly when he recognized who had flagged the Knight Bus,

"Blimey! It's 'Arry Potter! I can see 'is Scar! Ern, come 'ere! Come –"Said an overexcited Stan, only to be stopped abruptly as Harry interrupted.

"If you don't mind Stan, kindly _do shut up. I hate people gawking at the bloody _Scar_. I need to get to the Leaky Cauldrons, if you could take me there." Harry said, in a chilling voice much unlike his own. _

"Ok. Err, that'll be eleven Sickles, but for firteen you get 'ot chocolate and for fifteen you get an 'ot water bottle an' a toofbrush in the colour of your choice."

Harry rummaged in his trunk, handed over the Sickles right at the back of the bus. Harry noticed by this time that both Ernie and Stan were looking at him strangely, something akin to fear was in their eyes. Harry smiled to himself, if there was one thing he hated, it was being gawked at and praised because of his Scar. The incident with Stan was a prime example – he hated being fawned over and was not going to stand for it any longer. He knew the way he had spoken to Stan was harsh but he hated the feeling that he was only liked because of his name. That thought led him back to thinking about his friends, Ron and Hermione in particular. They were his best friends and he loved them, but did they only like him because of his fame? Harry turned away from the stares and faced the wall, alone with his thoughts. He knew that they were his friends and that he had the ability to hurt them, especially Ron. He was quick with his temper, held a grudge and could make your life a misery; the incident with the Triwizard Tournament was prime example. As for Hermione, she gave Harry no doubt; she would always be there – even if Ron was being a prick.

He started to think about Sirius and Remus. He heard from them both often, they were away on a mission for Dumbledore in regards to Voldemort. Since Sirius was still believed guilty he had to travel in his dog form – hence Remus went with him. They always wrote telling Harry that they loved him and would be there for him. But were they? The paranoia in his mind was telling him otherwise. Did they really love him? Or was it because of some sense of duty to his parents, or because Harry reminded them of there lost friends?

Harry broke himself from these thoughts – he didn't want to think that no body loved him. But the paranoia side of his brain wouldn't give up. His confidence had been all but shattered. Years of put-downs and abuse had done that to him.  Harry looked towards the windows of the Knight Bus. They were thundering along Charing Cross Road. Ernie suddenly slammed on the brakes and the Knight Bus skidded to a halt in front of the small Leaky Cauldron pub, behind which lay the entrance to Diagon Alley.

"Thanks" Harry muttered as he stepped of the bus and swiftly made his way towards the bar and towards Tom, the landlord.

"Could I book a room out from now until September 1st," inquired Harry as he shuffled his feet on the ground.

"Errr...yes certainly Mister Potter. Room eleven is free. I'll take your baggage up now," replied a confused Tom.

"Thank you. Could you please post this to Headmaster Dumbledore for me and see that I am not disturbed?"

"Yes of course Mister Potter. Please if you need anything do not hesitate to ask. If you would follow me, I'll take you to your room."

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**End Chapter 2!! **

**_Please continue to review! ;-)_**

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	3. Chapter 3: All is well and spiffing than...

**_Disclaimer:__ OK, I say this now. I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER AND HIS UNIVERSE. All is J.K Rowlings. I'm only borrowing them for now – imprisoning them in little jars and controlling their every move. But don't worry I did put air holes in the jars... well not many in Voldemorts.... but a lot in Sevvies – coz he's lovely and I love him! Ummmm Snape on a stick...Yummy._**

**_Summary:__ Dark!Harry. (Slytherin)Harry finally realises he's not just a pawn in Dumbledore's game – but neither is he a pawn of Voldemort's. What he does control, is his own life. He gets new friends, alliances and mentors, including finding a trusted friend and counsel in Professor Snape._**

**_Pairing:__ Definitely a Harry and Snape mentoring thing. But should it be more father/son, mentor/student, or romance??? Not sure._**

_DM/HG – much later on though. Gotta get things established first haven't I?!? Hehe_

**_Other notes: This note is both this story and 'I don't wanna miss a thing.' _**_I have exams starting this week (Monday 12th May) and they are really important (AS-Levels) I need to get at least AABB so obviously that is my primary concern. Both stories may not be updated in a while and I apologise but I will try me best. That's a promise!_

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**_Thank you's – _**_Thank you all so much for reviewing – it means so much to me, especially since I have received so many. I hope you continue to read the story and that you continue to enjoy it. Thank you to **Ian** who added me to his Favourites list – it almost made me cry – that made my day! Also thank you to **Erin** for being such a great BETA – love ya!_

_Anyway on with story! Any comments__ – either review or E-mail me!_

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**_Chapter 3: All is well and spiffing thank you very much._**

Albus,

The purpose of this letter is to inform you that I wish to be resorted. For five years I've been what a Gryffindor should be. I've faced the evil, accepted the praise and I hated myself for it. But it was over the course of last year that I was starting to see what was really going on around me. I've always only wanted to be Harry – just Harry Potter without any false title. I don't want to be the boy who lived but unfortunately I am. 

I'm a Slytherin, Headmaster; I'm not a Gryffindor. I've acted the Gryffindor because I felt that is what I was supposed to be. I don't want to pretend anymore. When the sorting hat was put on my head, I was only eleven. I had met one person and made a quick decision that changed my future. I had listened to those around me who all had extremely biased views themselves. I convinced myself that Slytherin was evil. My judgement was wrong. I did not tell those around me because I was ashamed – I was scared, scared of what they would think of me – the so-called 'perfect' boy who lived.  I know that Salazar Slytherin had different ideals, and he may not have been a nice wizard but that does not mean that every person that is sorted into Slytherin is an exact replica of Salazar himself. Yes, many from the house turn out to the Death Eaters and follow the path of evil, but why do they turn? It is because it is what they have been brought up to believe, they have never been told otherwise, never been shown the other side. And that, Headmaster is perhaps one of your biggest mistakes. You should be promoting inter-house interaction not encouraging the rivalry. You are supposed to be powerful and good and for so long I followed you blindly but I realize now that you are a coward. You are a coward because you are afraid of what that change might bring – it would, after all, disrupt your perfect plan.

The only teacher, besides professor McGonagall that even tries to disperse this rivalry is professor Snape. Sure it may also allow him to take extra points from Gryffindor and make him extremely happy, but he does pair up students from different houses. He makes us work together, maybe hoping that we'll break these chains that weigh down on us. And for that I respect him greatly.

It was in my third and fourth years – when I came face to face with the truth, that my perspective changed. Peter Pettigrew was a Death Eater, a traitor to the light. He was a Gryffindor. And professor Snape was a Death Eater but turned to the light. I do not know why, and I do not need to know why – he was a Slytherin. Makes you think doesn't it? Do you see why I don't believe in your house rivalries? There is no such thing as pure good and evil or black and white; there are shades of grey that lie in-between.

The houses resemble different characteristics and traits in every person and set them into one category. People have a variety of different characteristics. Every one is unique. It is absurd to restrict them in such a way. We are children, we need to grow and develop our talents and personalities. I say it again. I am a Slytherin.

Secondly I've realized what you really are, Headmaster. I respect you – that you should know and I do not classify you as 'evil'. Voldemort is what I really consider evil, not you. You are, however, extremely manipulative. You use people for your own gain, and I will no longer be your tool. I will not abandon the light. I will not abandon my true friends – but I will do it in my own way. I am not evil; I will never turn to Voldemort. He killed my parents remember and I will have my revenge, but I will not put up with your shit any longer.

I want to be Harry. I want my friends to like me for me, not for the title that has been attached to my name, for something I do not remember.

I have also sent a copy of this letter to Ron, Hermione, Professor McGonagall and Professor Snape. I want them to see this I order to understand my reasoning and my decisions. I want them to know the truth, and I hope they will accept me for what I truly am.

Sincerely

Harry Potter.

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Albus Dumbledore, put the letter down and his head in his hands. A similar reaction could be seen from McGonagall – a faint proud smile gracing her features.

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Both Ron and Hermione sat stunned.

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"Well I see you've finally seen the truth, Harry. And for that I respect you. You are welcome in Slytherin." Professor Snape said and he wrote as much in the reply he sent to Harry.

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Remember to review – I need them as much as I need Oxygen. Which I need a lot – trust me, I can't hold my breath for long.

So press the little 'go' button and leave a lovely review!! Thank you. Love you all loads and loads! Until next time! **Happy Un-Birthday to you all (unless it's your birthday – then happy birthday!) ****J**


	4. Chapter 4: In France they call it The ro...

**_Disclaimer:_**_ OK, I say this now. I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER AND HIS UNIVERSE. All is J.K Rowlings. I'm only borrowing them for now – imprisoning them in little jars and controlling their every move. But don't worry I did put air holes in the jars... well not many in Voldemorts.... but a lot in Sevvies – coz he's lovely and I love him! Ummmm Snape on a stick...Yummy._

**_Summary:_**_ Dark!Harry. (Slytherin)Harry finally realises he's not just a pawn in Dumbledore's game – but neither is he a pawn of Voldemort's. What he does control is his own life. He gets new friends, alliances and mentors, including finding a trusted friend and counsel in Professor Snape._

**_Pairing: _**_Thanks to all of you who helped with me this. But I have decided (with your help) that it will start of as **HP/SS** **FRIENDSHIP** but **WILL PROGRESS TO** **SLASH**. Although gradually. **HOWEVER IT WILL BE SLASH**. Sorry if this upsets anyone – but it might not be for a while. **You have been warned but I will continue to warn you!**_

DM/HG – much later on though. Gotta get things established first haven't I?!? Hehe

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REVIEW RESPONSES AND THANK YOU'S. IF I HAVE MISSED ANY BODY I'M V.V.V.V.SORRY! LOVE YOU ALL!! XXXX

Exams are a pain and they are annoying me! They aren't easy but they're not exactly impossible either! I'm pulling through. Taking Diagonlist's advice I decided to write another chapter and take my mind off exams! So here it is – hope you like!! Thank's to my wonderful BETAs (Abbie and Erin) – who have been a great!

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**Chapter 4 –  In France they call it The royale with cheese.******

Three weeks had passed since that first letter that Harry had sent to Dumbledore. He of course had received replies from everyone he had written to, including Hermione and Ron. Hermione, although hurt that Harry wished had questioned the true intent of their friendship, had seen Harry's logic – or subsequently seen the pattern to Harry's madness. She accepted it firmly stating that '_you're my best friend – you will always be my best friend'._ Ron, however, reacted differently. Much as Hermione had done, he assured Harry that he would never abandon him, but could not exactly comprehend the 'shades of gray' idea. And Harry, try as he may he couldn't blame him. Ron had grown up in the belief that Slytherins were and are evil, an assumption leading to a strong negative stereotype. And as most people know, once stereotypes are formed, they are very resistant to change. People adopt selective remembering; that is they remember information that supports the stereotypes that they hold thus resisting to changing their attitudes. It would be hard for Ron to put aside these 'beliefs'. Stereotypes radically simplify our social world; since they reduce the amount of processing we need to carry out when faced with new people or groups. Therefore unraveling Ron's stereotypes would completely conflict his world – leading him to question other attitudes held by him. Harry was just glad he was going to try. 

Still pondering his thoughts Harry made his way out of the Leaky Cauldron and into muggle London. He had already brought all of his school supplies but now wishes to but a few extra items. He needed new clothes for a start. While in Diagon Alley, he had bought new robes and other such garments, but due to his ignorant upbringing had always preferred muggle clothes. Quickly making his way into a department store, Harry sat to work on buying a complete new wardrobe. Exiting the store three hours later, laden with bags, which he promptly shrunk, considerably less wealthy than he had been 4 hours previously, and leaving four grinning shop assistants who worked on commission, he pondered where to go next. Making up his mind, Harry set out for '_Waterstones_' [1]. Since the beginning of last summer, when Harry was at 'home' with the Dursleys, Harry had taken to reading in an effort to escape his mind. Dudley, although in Harry's opinion, couldn't read, had a fairly large, albeit unused collected of books in his second bedroom. Granted most of the novels were only there because they had been adapted to film, but Harry had read them. When Harry had once again been forced into the cupboard under the stairs, he had lost that escape. He had no escape from his mind. 

Making his way into the shop Harry started to wonder up and down the aisles before he found what he was looking for; the sci-fi and fantasy section. The genre really intrigued him; there were no limits to the worlds that the pages described and your imagination to take to those places in a heartbeat. He picked up what he wanted and continued looking around the store. He picked up classic literature, comedy, thriller and crime – anything that took his fancy. Paying for the fifty or so books that he found, he shrunk them and made his way back to the pub. 

When he arrived back at the Leaky Cauldron 45 minutes later and relieving himself of his baggage, he looked up to see a Hogwarts owl sitting on his bed – a letter tied to its foot. 

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Harry stretched out his hand at last to take the yellowish envelope, addressed in emerald green to _Mr. H. Potter, Room 11, The Leaky Cauldron, London._ He pulled out the letter and read: 

_HOGWARTS SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY._

_Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore_

_(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. Of Wizards.)_

_Dear Mr. Potter,_

_Due to your request for a re-sorting could you please arrange to arrive at school on August 31st to get settled into your new house. Please find enclosed a portkey to transport you to the Great Hall – to activate it just tap it with your wand and say 'lemon drops'. See you at school Harry and please do not worry about the portkey, I assure you that it is safe._

_Yours Sincerely,_

_Minerva McGonagall,_

_Deputy Headmistress._

~*~*~* 

A day later Harry had packed up his belongings and had gotten ready for a new school year. His sixth year. Earlier on in the summer, Harry had received his OWL results. Unsurprisingly to the teachers, Harry had come joint top of the year with Hermione. Harry had really applied himself during his fifth year – it was a positive effort to forget all the evil surrounding his life. As he had found with reading, engrossing himself in his work gave him something else to keep his mind busy. And he also found that he enjoyed it – his thirst for knowledge grew and he soon proved that there was more to him than being_ the-boy-who-lived, _he finally felt that he deserved the praise given to him. One of his proudest moments was when Snape had kept him after class and congratulated him. He found himself wanting more and more of that almost unreachable praise. 

Paying his bill to Tom and saying a fond 'thank you and good bye', Harry gave his baggage a final look over. Realizing that he couldn't put it off any longer Harry swallowed the feelings of guilt, fear and panic that brought back so many unpleasant memories, took a deep breath and activated the portkey. Harry felt the familiar hook behind his navel and found himself on the floor in the Great Hall of Hogwarts. Curling himself into a ball, rocking back and forth while he endured wave after brutal wave of nausea that hit his body. His head was swimming badly, while the onslaught of horrid memories caused his body to shake violently. All the while, he was unaware of being watched by two other people. 

After what seemed like eternity but in reality was only five minutes Harry picked himself up and dusted himself off. "Welcome back Harry" was the first thing he heard. 

~*~*~* 

Harry turned to the voice and found that it was Professor McGonagall who greeted him, Professor Snape at her side. Giving a slight smile and replying with a "_Good morning, Professors" _Harry was directed to Professor Dumbledore's office. 

"Hello Mr. Potter. I trust that you are well. Please take a seat," addressed Dumbledore, when Harry and his two professors entered the office. 

"Thank you, sir, and I am well. Yourself?" replied Harry in a pleasant yet formal tone. He wasn't about to be sugarcoated by Dumbledore – knowing that the effect would only be finding himself once again in Dumbledore's trap. 

"I'm fine, Mr. Potter. Now the reason that you are here is that you have requested a re-sorting. Both Professors McGonagall and Snape are here that witness it. Are you sure you wish to do this Harry?" His eyes and heart pleaded with Harry to change his mind. He wanted his Harry back – the little boy who gave him his undying respect. 

"Yes Sir, I still wish to be re-sorted," came the confident reply. 

"Very well" the old headmaster said with a sigh, suddenly looking his age. There was no sparkle in his eyes and his smile held no mirth. He gently retrieved the aged and worn sorting hat and placed it upon Harry Potter's head, all the while no sound came from either of the two professors. 

_'Hmm'_, said a small voice in his ear. '_You have seen the truth, Mr. Potter. There was another like you as well; he also chose the truth. You have grown, I see, Mr. Potter. Oh yes, you have talent all right, and a great deal of intelligence, bravery, loyalty, cunning. You can be great, Mr. Potter. If you are not going to argue with me, Mr. Potter, I am going to place you where I should have placed you to begin with. You will do well in SLYTHERIN!'_ The hat shouted at last. 

~*~*~* 

Once the sorting had been done, Dumbledore dismissed the two professors from his office, requesting that Professor Snape come back in two hours. McGonagall said a last good bye to Harry and, in an action he wouldn't have suspected, held him tight whispering in his ear, _"I am so proud of you Harry, you have recognized who you are. You are both Gryffindor and Slytherin, Harry, and you are welcome in Gryffindor common room at any time. I will always be here, always, if you ever need me. Good bye Harry and good luck."_

She walked out with Professor Snape, leaving a stunned Harry behind her. 

"I believe we need to talk, Harry," said Dumbledore. 

"Yes Sir." Silence reigned around the circular office. All that could be heard was the soft snores from the portraits hanging around the room. Suddenly Harry asked a question that had been burning in his mind for the past year and a half. "Why?" 

"Why what, Mr. Potter?" 

"Why were my parents killed? Why was I sent to live with the Dursleys? Why didn't you check on me? Why didn't you care? Why do _I_ have to fight Voldemort? Why everything. Take your pick Professor!" Harry's voice was getting louder and louder with each question he asked – until he was shouting and panting for breath. Defeated he sunk into the chair, with an almost inaudible, "Why didn't you care?" 

~*~*~*

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Remember to review – I need them as much as I need Oxygen. Which I need a lot – trust me, I can't hold my breath for long.

So press the little 'go' button and leave a lovely review!! Thank you. Love you all loads and loads! Until next time! **Happy Un-Birthday to you all (unless it's your birthday – then happy birthday!) ****J**


	5. Chapter 5: Take the Red Pill

**_Disclaimer:_**_ OK, I say this now. I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER AND HIS UNIVERSE. All is J.K Rowlings. I'm only borrowing them for now – imprisoning them in little jars and controlling their every move. But don't worry I did put air holes in the jars... well not many in Voldemorts.... but a lot in Sevvies – coz he's lovely and I love him! Ummmm Snape on a stick...Yummy._

**_Summary:_**_ Dark!Harry. (Slytherin)Harry finally realises he's not just a pawn in Dumbledore's game – but neither is he a pawn of Voldemort's. What he does control is his own life. He gets new friends, alliances and mentors, including finding a trusted friend and counsel in Professor Snape._

**_Pairing: _**_Thanks to all of you who helped with me this. But I have decided (with your help) that it will start of as **HP/SS** **FRIENDSHIP** but **WILL PROGRESS TO** **SLASH**. Although gradually. **HOWEVER IT WILL BE SLASH**. Sorry if this upsets anyone – but it might not be for a while. **You have been warned but I will continue to warn you!**_

_DM/HG – much later on though. Gotta get things established first haven't I?!? Hehe_

_A/N: I'm sorry I haven't updated – there really is no excuse apart from me being really busy. I've now finished my exams!! Woo hoo! PARTY!! Thanks for all your support! Cross your fingers and wish me luck for good results __J_

_I'm posting this at 4.30pm (London time) on 14/06/03. I don't know what FF.net is doing but at the moment it's playing up, so if it doesn't unload or you don't get it – I'm v.v. sorry. Anyway 7 days to go!! I'm one of those people who is queuing up at midnight to get the book!! YAY!!_

_This HASN'T been BETA_ed because I could be bothered! Oops! If you do find any mistakes all my apologies._

_Love ya and enjoy!_

_Dawnie xxx _

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Chapter 5: Take the Red pill and I'll show you just how far the rabbit hole goes.

"Why didn't you care?"  Repeated Harry softly. Towards the end of his speech his voice wavered. No matter how strong he tried to be, the feelings of worthlessness kept returning to haunt his mind. It seemed to Harry that no one cared. 

Dumbledore had yet to say anything, choosing instead to peer intently at Harry from behind his half moon spectacles; once again wishing that his Harry would come back.

"Harry I – " Dumbledore began but then abruptly stopped what he was going to say. He answered instead "But I've always cared Harry."

Harry's dull and lifeless eyes suddenly became alight with a passion and anger that Dumbledore had not of thought possible. Harry rarely, if ever, showed his true unyielding power, but at that moment Dumbledores circular office seemed to shake with the raw energy pulsating from Harry.

"You always cared?" Mimicked Harry, disbelief and scorn were clear from his voice. The most clear however was hate. Pure unadulterated hate that was so tangible in the air you would almost be able to taste it. "You _never _cared."

"I swear Harry I did. I do." Pleaded Dumbledore, a snort was his only reply.

"I thought it was for the best." The old Headmaster continued. "I placed you in the Dursleys care because I was afraid of what the Wizarding World would do to you. Imagine it Harry – being famous before you could even walk or talk. Not to mention I though they would love you as their own son."

"Anything. Anyplace would have been better than at the Dursleys" Harry responded.

"I know that now. I left a letter, explaining the circumstances and I didn't see you again until you arrived at Hogwarts." Explained Dumbledore calmly; his eyes never left Harry's – seriousness written all over his features. "Not checking up on you was my biggest mistake. One that I will regret for the rest of my days." 

"You sent a letter?" Harry replied disbelievingly. "Oh well, that's OK then! Don't check on me for 10 years – but don't worry you wrote a letter!" Continued Harry, sarcasm ringing clearly in his voice and expression. He smirked at Dumbledore's wince.

"I didn't know anything was wrong. Why didn't you tell someone?" said Dumbledore.

"You not knowing anything was wrong is no excuse. You should have checked on me – if you cared you would have done so. I was neglected, malnourished, made to feel completely and utterly worthless by my own 'family'. I was abused; physically, mentally, emotionally and sexually. I was 'raised' in Hell.

"I didn't tell anyone because I couldn't. It was too hard. Imagine it professor – I was never told I was anything more than a freak. And then I was thrown into a place where I was loved and adored – I was famous. I never wanted the fame, but time and time again it has been placed upon me, mainly by you. You always overshadowed my little adventures here – You wanted to be sure that I would always in the spotlight – portrayed as a Hero. Ready to defeat the ultimate darkness. 

"I was afraid to tell. My fame didn't allow me to have a private life. I didn't want my business known by everyone – I didn't want to receive yet more pity and sympathy. And have you considered the fact that I am ashamed? What would that show the World? Harry Potter – the boy who defeated Voldemort can't stand up to his own _family_. I couldn't tell anyone – but you should have found out."

Harry turned away from Dumbledore so that he wouldn't be able to see the tears glistening in his eyes. From his position he was unaware that his Headmaster had move until he was kneeling in front of him.

"Harry I'm so sorry. Harry please, please forgive me." Asked Dumbledore "please."

Harry didn't reply for a long time, he sat in his chair and switched off. After about 5 minutes he finally looked up and spoke,

"I don't think I can ever forgive you. Don't pressure me. Keep the hell away from me and I might one day be able to stomach talking to you again. Goodbye Headmaster.

He stood up and walked out of the office without a backward glance. Never once seeing his Headmaster broken and frail on the floor of his office. 

~*~*~*~*~

Harry walked quickly down the stairs leading way from Dumbledores office, soon finding himself outside the stone gargoyle and realising that he had no idea where he was to go then. He was being moved to a new room near the Slytherin Dungeons and so therefore didn't know where to go. He was so deep in his thoughts that he didn't see Snape approach, 

"Mr Potter" startled, Harry jumped causing Snape to look at his in disdain. "You should be alert at all times Potter – use those reflexes of yours." Sneered Snape. "Follow me."

"Yes Sir" obediently replied Harry, almost running to keep up with his potions professor and new Head of House.

"Your belongings have already been brought to your room." Snape said when the two stopped in front of a portrait of – 

"Sir Cadogan?!?"  Harry gasped, his voice portraying his feelings of exasperation. "Oh no!" he mumbled to himself unaware that Snape could hear him.

"I suggest you change the password regularly. Please inform me when you do so. I'm sure you can use your sole brain cell to understand why." Sneered Snape.

"Yes Sir" said Harry.

"Please come to my office if you have any questions. See you tomorrow Potter." That said Snape stalked of to his lower part of the Dungeons.

"See you tomorrow Sir." Harry replied to the retreating figure not knowing if his teacher heard him or not.

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_Thank you to everyone who reviewed. I have 61 reviews – that is AMAZING!! Never would I have imagined getting so many. Your continued support is lovely and it means so much to me._

_Anyway please continue to review! I'm aiming for 100 now! You've all inspired me! Hehe_

_Press the little 'go' button – it is your friend!_

I hope you liked the chapter. 

_Love Dawnie xxx_


	6. Chapter 6: “Some of the worst things hav...

**_Disclaimer:_**_ OK, I say this now. I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER AND HIS UNIVERSE. All is J.K Rowlings. I'm only borrowing them for now – imprisoning them in little jars and controlling their every move. But don't worry I did put air holes in the jars... well not many in Voldemorts.... but a lot in Sevvies – coz he's lovely and I love him! Ummmm Snape on a stick...Yummy._

**_Summary:_**_ Dark!Harry. (Slytherin)Harry finally realises he's not just a pawn in Dumbledore's game – but neither is he a pawn of Voldemort's. What he does control is his own life. He gets new friends, alliances and mentors, including finding a trusted friend and counsel in Professor Snape._

****

**_Pairing: _**_SS/HP and a few other pairings!_

Thank you for being so patient but this is the longest chapter yet! So I really hope you like. Thank you very much for reviewing! I love you all! I've read OotP twice now! I love it! But there are no spoilers in this story!  This hasn't been BETA_ed coz I couldn't be bothered! Oops!

**_Empty Backpack_**_ - Yes chapter 2 is from Red Dwarf – which I loovve! All the chapter titles are from films. **10 points to all those who can name which titles go with which film!**___

**_Mad Hatter _**_– Longest sentence I have ever read!! Thanks for the review and I'm gald you like the story._

**_To everyone else: A BIG Thank you!_**

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**Chapter 6: "Some of the worst things have been done with the best intentions."**

Harry walked aimlessly around the halls of Hogwarts; barely awake but unable to sleep. Clad in only his pyjamas Harry shivered from the faint breeze present in the Dungeons. He continued his slow pace going deeper into the darkness, leading deeper into the Dungeons. On this quiet night the only sound was the groaning of the old castle walls and the faint whispering of the wind. Since he was the only student present in the school – he neglected to bring his invisibility cloak.

It was 3:00am in the morning of September 1st. Harry's thoughts continued to plague him. He was mulling over everything that had happened, throughout his fifth year and the last summer. He was confused, what was he supposed to be feeling? He thoughts of his friends, professors, Voldemort and his 'family' haunted his waking hours and now when he was sleeping, albeit unsuccessfully. The thoughts of his 'family' scared him to the core than anything else possible did. They had hurt him. And he still wasn't able to _feel that hurt. He had to be strong. As a consequence of their actions towards him he now couldn't stand to be touched, to be shocked – more importantly he was scared of people all together. And now in less than 14 hours he would once again, be surrounded by his most predominant fear. He had lost all confidence in his Headmaster and he hadn't yet been able to see his friends. And although McGonagall was supporting him, she was still the Deputy Headmistress. Who was left that he could trust? Sirius? Remus? Could they accept him for what he really was? Then a name flashed clearly in his mind – Professor Snape. __Could he trust Snape? He wondered. The resounding 'yes' in his mind was immediate. Snape had always protected him – and rather grudgingly helped him. Granted he never showed anything but hostility, loathing and hatred publicly – but Harry knew that he could trust him. With his life. __'Maybe he could help me?'  thought Harry. The idea was squashed abruptly as Harry thought on it more. Snape only thought of Harry as a mini-James – the foundation stone as to why Snape hated Harry. __'But I'm not my father.' Harry thought heatedly, __'I'm not!" But there was no way that Harry could convince Snape otherwise. Harry gave a small snort at the absurdity of it all. He was trying to think up ways to get Snape to like him!_

"Can I ask what is so funny Mr Potter?" Harry jumped at the sound of that voice. The fact that he jumped once again reinforced his fear of people. He also realised that he had let his guard down twice now- and both times Snape had surprised him.

"Well Mr Potter?" asked Snape patiently, one eyebrow raised and a scowl etched upon his face.

"It's nothing Sir." Replied Harry quietly. Snape was angry and Harry had made him angry. And now – Harry thought that the only logical option was for Snape to take his anger out on Harry. His legs were frantically telling him to run – to not be hurt again while his brain tried to reassure him that Snape would not hurt him. Harry looked down – he refused to meet his professor's eyes, his fear rooting him to where he stood. Nothing happened. If Snape had noticed Harry's reaction, he wisely chose not to say anything.

"Why do you hate me?" asked Harry so quietly that Snape could have sworn it was only the wind. Snape didn't answer Harry's question but said instead,

"Follow me and keep up."

Unaware of wear he was going but afraid of the repercussions of not following Harry followed dutifully behind Snape, trying to keep up with the brisk pace that Snape had set. Terrified of what was going to happen – _Why the hell did I ask that question? He scolded himself angrily._

They arrived outside a door which once Snape had said the password – one which Harry didn't quite catch, opened quickly. Beckoning Harry to come inside, it soon became clear that the rooms that Harry was admiring, were in fact his potion professors. The room was a mixture of past and contemporary themes – if there is such a thing, along with the obvious green, silver and black were blues of different hues and soft creams and beiges. The rooms, Harry noted, were also much larger than his own.

"If you are quite finished staring Mr Potter, please sit down."

Following Snape's example Harry sat in the chair directly opposite Snape parallel to the fire. Unsure of where to look Harry chose to stare into the flames, only looking up again when he heard a small cough coming from behind him. It occurred to Harry that while he was staring absently into space, Snape had gotten them both drinks. Taking the coffee graciously Harry started taking sips.

"Why am I here?" enquired Harry timidly.

"You asked me a question Potter. I presumed that you wanted the answer to the question and the sort of answer that I would give is best said in private. However if you do not want an answer please feel free to leave." sneered Snape.

Seeing Harry sit straighter in his chair, ignoring his rapidly going cold coffee, Snape started talking.

 "It's a long story Potter and I will not tolerate being interrupted." said Snape silkily.

"Yes Sir" replied Harry.

"You wanted to know why I hate you. And the truthful answer is because of your father –"started Snape.

"But I'm not him" shouted Harry.

"I said I did not want to be interrupted Mr Potter. You did not let me finish." Glared Snape "As I was saying, in you I saw your father. It was only when I received your letter that I realised that you are not him – but your own person. The relationship between your father and I was not simply dislike, we hated each other. And it intensified when he saved my life. I will not go into the details now as the subject matter is too large but you have to understand that the feelings between us were entirely mutual."

Pausing to collect his thoughts, Snape took a sip of his drink and continued talking.

"And then he died and you lived. I didn't see you until you came to Hogwarts at the age of eleven and I knew who you were immediately. The reaction was instantaneous – in my eyes, your father – my worst enemy was back. And with it came the hatred. But I knew that I had to protect you. I knew that Voldemort would be back and you would be his main target. You consistently disregarded every rule and it was allowed to continue. You just didn't realise the danger you were in – and still are. You were like your father – arrogant, nosy, radiating enthusiasm, reckless and worst of all you just didn't try. I knew what you were capable of, what your full potential –was, is! I realise that my behaviour may have been petty but your attitude angered me above anything."

"But I'm not him." Spat Harry angrily "I don't want to be him. I am me. I know my behaviour in the past was fool-hardy and stupid. But I just didn't comprehend the danger. I spent last year keeping way from trouble – to applying myself – to trying! I want to do well and to reach my full potential. I want to be my own person – make my own mistakes and learn from them. But how can I prove it to you? What do you want me to do?" said Harry; his anger had dissipated to weariness. "I'm sorry" said Harry quietly "But I have tried – really I have." 

"I know" said Snape "And as for proving you're not your father – you have already done that. You broke away from what you thought you had to do and took charge of your own life. Being asked to be resorted is a prime example of that. Never before have I seen such a display of maturity. You showed to me last year your true potential – anybody looking at your OWL results will see that you are very intelligent. I for one would not have allowed you in my advanced potions class if you hadn't achieved anything but 'Outstanding' in your OWL. It shows great courage to do what you did – to stand up to Dumbledore, to risk what you have. But you've done it. So no Mr Potter, I do not hate you. Don't like you very much but understand you and respect you." concluded Snape never once looking away from Harry.

"Thank you Sir. That means a lot to me" replied Harry.

"Good. Now go away and leave me in peace. I'll see you tomorrow Mr Potter and I hope you understand that there is to be no more late night wonderings."

"Yes sir."

It was just as Harry was leaving that Snape had the last word,

"Oh and Mr Potter - I am _very_ proud of you."

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_End Chapter! Hope you enjoyed! Please please review! _

_Remember to review – I need them as much as I need Oxygen. Which I need a lot – trust me, I can't hold my breath for long._

_So press the little 'go' button and leave a lovely review!! Thank you. Love you all loads and loads! Until next time! **Happy Un-Birthday to you all (unless it's your birthday – then happy birthday!) **_**_J_**


	7. Chapter 7: No one can make you feel infe...

**_Disclaimer:_**_ OK, I say this now. I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER AND HIS UNIVERSE. All is J.K Rowlings. I'm only borrowing them for now – imprisoning them in little jars and controlling their every move. But don't worry I did put air holes in the jars... well not many in Voldemorts.... but a lot in Sevvies – coz he's lovely and I love him! Ummmm Snape on a stick...Yummy._

**_Summary:_**_ Dark!Harry. (Slytherin)Harry finally realises he's not just a pawn in Dumbledore's game – but neither is he a pawn of Voldemort's. What he does control is his own life. He gets new friends, alliances and mentors, including finding a trusted friend and counsel in Professor Snape. _**This is fictional. References made to the social services etc are entirely my imagination and is not to be taken for fact.**

**_Pairing: _**_Thanks to all of you who helped with me this. But I have decided (with your help) that it will start of as **HP/SS** **FRIENDSHIP** but **WILL PROGRESS TO** **SLASH**. Although gradually. **HOWEVER IT WILL BE SLASH**. Sorry if this upsets anyone – but it might not be for a while. **You have been warned but I will continue to warn you!**_

_DM/HG – much later on though. Gotta get things established first haven't I?!? Hehe_

**_To the Reviewers: _Here it is, the new and improved Chapter 7. I know some people read the previous version before I took it down – thank you for your lovely reviews. I hope you will read this again and like it even more. I must particularly thank Abraxis – without your wonderfully helpful and inspiring review this chapter would never have been written. This chapter is dedicated to you. I hope you like it. (It's also 1000 words longer than the original – that should hopefully make a certain person happier!! Lol)**

Chapter 7: 

It was the gentle tapping at the door that awoke Harry from his sleep. Checking the clock beside his bed for the time he saw that it was 1pm. He sighed; he had only managed to fall asleep at about 5am after he had returned to his rooms following the talk with professor Snape and as such had slept in a lot later than he usually would. The final words had whirled around his head for what had seemed like ages. A constant reminder, plaguing him until he finally fell into a fitful sleep. _"I am very proud of you."_

Irritated by the persistent knocking at the door Harry – rather ungraciously got out of his warm and cosy bed and made his way towards the knocking – muttering curses all the while, directed at the person on the other side. It was Dobby. Inwardly Harry groaned.

"Hello Dobby" greeted Harry at the door, "what can I do for you?"

The little elf's eyes lit up once Harry had addressed him, "Professor Dumbledore asked Dobby to ask Mr Harry Potter to come to his office immediately. He says it is very important sir." Replied Dobby bouncing up and down with glee that he had correctly delivered the message.

"What does he want?" Harry muttered to himself after he had thanked Dobby and assured the little elf that he would visit the kitchen very soon.  

Still mumbling Harry picked out his clothes, put them on and left his bedroom.

Reaching the stone gargoyle that guarded the Headmasters office Harry said the password – _Oreo Cookies - _and went up the stairs and knocked on the door. 

*~*

"Come in Harry" called Dumbledore from his office. Harry walked into the circular office and looked at the others in the room. Seated opposite Dumbledore's desk sat his new Head of House – Severus Snape, Sirius, Arthur Weasley – who was the new Minister of Magic and professor McGonagall. Harry chose to ignore the fluttery feeling in his stomach when he addressed Snape – choosing instead to dwell on the sudden and strange reaction later on – when he was safely back in his own quarters. Harry moved across the room and sat in the remaining seat positioned next to his godfather. The room was silent and Harry felt the uncomfortable atmosphere in the room – noticing the tension between the other occupants in the room.

"Hello Harry. Thank you for coming so quickly but I guess you are wondering why I called you here?" Said Dumbledore breaking the silence in his office. His voice seemed to waver slightly while he spoke to Harry – maybe it was fear, or even anger in his voice – maybe even both but Harry couldn't decipher which. 

"Hello Headmaster, and yes to answer your question – I am curious as to why to summoned me here." Replied Harry, looking up from staring at the floor. He was still angry with him but most of the anger was leaving to be replaced with the bitter taste of betrayal and powerlessness. Harry continued to look at the man he had trusted and respected for so long. _'Do you understand how much I hate you right now?' _thought but not spoken.

"Harry, your godfather and myself have been in contact with the muggle social services in regards to your treatment at the Dursley household. Due to the number of students with muggle upbringings that attend the school it comes upon myself, the teachers and those on the school board to work closely with the muggle social services. They are then given the list of students for their records. In the wizarding world we also have the same type of system for the students who have been brought up in the magical world. We cannot put muggle raised children on the list simply because we do not have the authority to do so. Do you understand so far Harry?"  Asked Dumbledore. Harry got the distinct impression from the way that the speech had been delivered that it had been rather thoroughly rehearsed.

"Yes Sir." Harry replied and he had. It was common sense really. The muggle social services looked after the muggle raised children and the wizarding social services looked after the wizard – raised children.

"Ah good, now I can explain the purpose of asking you here. If either myself or any branch of the social services suspects any mistreatment towards any student, we co-operate together to find answers and if the situation should arise – we remove the child from the household. This is normally settled in a Court of Law overseen by the Minister of Magic. It was decided long ago that in a trial involving a student from Hogwarts, the wizard court would be given jurisdiction over muggles. The muggles on trial would then be granted with a muggle-raised wizard solicitor to defend them. In all other cases we would not be given authority but in circumstances such as these we feel it is necessary for both the privacy and well being of the student. If it is then decided that the child should be removed from muggle care then Hogwarts and the social services come to an agreement together. That is what today is about Harry. We are taking the Dursleys to court and to see them punished for their crimes. Testimonies will be given and an unbiased jury will decide the verdict. No members of the press are allowed access and all involved in the trial take an oath of honesty. I know it's a lot to take in but myself, Sirius and Arthur all feel it's the best course of action." Dumbledore finished – looking apprehensively at Harry.

*~*

Harry stood outside the room where he would once again be face to face with the Dursleys. He was nervous – not only was he about to face _them_ but also he would be in front of _others_ – people who would pity him.  He didn't think he would be able to stand it. He was Harry Potter – Saviour of the Wizarding World. He could face dangers – heck he had faced Voldemort numerous times and survived but the idea of facing _them_ sent chills down his spine.

"They can't hurt you anymore" came a voice from the corner.

"Maybe not physically but they can still get to me mentally." Replied Harry not looking at the figure. "They've come here – they have come to the place I have always thought of my home and sanctuary - but _they still get to me. I don't feel safe anymore." _Finished Harry quietly.

Snape stepped out of the shadows and Harry who had finally turned around to face him continued. " How can I go out into that room and face all of their pity?"

"Haven't you ever thought that this will ultimately make you stronger? Maybe you won't feel it straight away but it will be there – inside of you. And that those eyes that will look upon you now, will someday admire your strength? You can inspire them, you can show them, and you can change them. They admire you – those who are hurt now – will know that they have a chance. _Do you understand you are not the only one? _Others out there are suffering right now. And if you do this today it may not make a huge different to start with – but _it is_ a start. Harry you can do this – I know you can. I've been watching you and you're strong. And if you feel yourself weakening I'll be there offering support." Snape finished looking a Harry – and Harry saw sincerity in his eyes.

"Thank you Sir." Said Harry and he walked into the courtroom.

"You are welcome Harry," replied Snape into the empty and silent room.

*~*

The room that he walked into would not have been recognisable as his Headmasters office. The room had been altered to what looked like a courtroom. Numerous chairs filled the sides of the room, which were occupied by many witches, and wizards who were all staring intently at Harry. In between the two sides – but slightly back sat the Minister of Magic. In front of him were two benches apart from one another. At one bench sat Professor Dumbledore and on the other sat Mr and Mrs Dursley and Dudley Dursley with another man whom Harry did not recognise. Harry refused to meet their eyes. Looking up at the people sitting in the chairs Harry recognised a few. He saw his professors, all the Weasleys, Hermione, Mrs Figg and numerous other witches and wizards he had met in the past. He also saw Snape.

"Harry" Arthur Weasley – the Minister of Magic began "please come forward and sit beside professor Dumbledore."

He walked uncertainly up to the front and sat down next to his Headmaster. He kept his face neutral allowing none of his emotions to escape past his mask. _He had to be strong – he had to be the hero._

Daring a look at the Dursleys he saw that they were not looking in his direction but instead were talking with, what Harry could only guess, was their solicitor. Looking up into the stands once more Harry did see pity – hundred of gazes. Making himself turn away from their stares he looked back to the Minister Harry continued to listen to what was being said.

"The muggle Social services and ourselves have received information and evidence that you were abused and neglected while in the care of the Dursleys. We are here today to convict your _'family'_ of these hideous crimes." Said Arthur glaring at the accused.

*~*

The morning progressed very quickly and judging by the faces in the crowd it was pretty obvious that the trial would not last very long. Testimonies were heard from numerous people including Madame Pomphrey, Albus Dumbledore and Mrs Weasley.

The Dursleys also testified and claimed that they had never abused _the freak_, only treated him as they thought _a freak_ should be treated. They didn't admit to violent punishment or the cupboard, or neglect or sexual abuse. Of course they didn't deny their hatred for Harry – claiming that magic was wrong and the whole court biased.

Their solicitor – who Harry noted often glared at them – whilst trying to defend them argued that the Dursleys had been given no choice in raising Harry and that they simply didn't have the resources to care for another child. This point however was quickly squashed once it became once the extratravegant expenses on Dudley and themselves became apparent.

Throughout the trial Harry was not asked to testify – the only thing he had, had to say throughout the trial was admitting that the allegations were true. Professor Dumbledore had said it would be unlikely that he would be called up at all.

Harry often found his gaze straying to professor Snape; who had not really looked away form Harry since the beginning of the trial. The funny jolt that he had experienced earlier had happened a few times when looking at his teacher. But Harry could not for the life of him figure out what it meant. He did know however, that he wanted to know more about his secretive professor. He wanted to understand him and to confide in him. No matter how much Harry tried to deny it, he trusted him, possibly more than anyone else – which really shocked Harry.  _How can you wholeheartedly trust someone without really knowing him or her? _Harry respected him and although he had yet to earn his professors trust – he wanted to. He just didn't have a clue on how to achieve this.

Harry looked away and saw the endless sea of faces. Many were openly staring at him – and some were trying to be discrete. In each of the faces he saw fear, pity and in some – disgust. In only one face did he see understanding. _Do you understand you are not the only one?_

Arthur started to talk again "Thank you everyone. Today we have heard from all people linked with this case, as well as having seen numerous pieces of evidence. It is in the courts decision that all three are guilty as charged. Petunia Dursley shall be sent to Azkaban prison for the rest of her days on the count of child abuse, neglect and for willingly allowing these crimes to continue and taking no action into stopping it. Under no circumstances shall there be a retrial. Both Vernon Dursley and Dudley Dursley are to be given the Dementors Kiss immediately upon their arrival at Azkaban prison on the counts of rape, physical abuse and neglect. Take this filth away." Finished Arthur with an utter look of loathing aimed towards the Dursleys.

The sentences were met by cheers from the stands as all three guilty persons where dragged away. Harry refused to look at them. Looking instead at one face. _Do you understand the pain I feel right now?_ Harry left the room – away from the cheers and the stare. Away from the Dursleys. _It was over._

_*~*_

**_End Chapter 7. _So what did ya think? God it was hard to write! Please review!! Please – otherwise I think I will go insane from not knowing what you think!!**

**Thank you! Love Dawn xxx**


	8. Chapter 8: My Saving Grace

**_Disclaimer:_**_ OK, I say this now. I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER AND HIS UNIVERSE. All is J.K Rowlings. I'm only borrowing them for now – imprisoning them in little jars and controlling their every move. But don't worry I did put air holes in the jars... well not many in Voldemorts.... but a lot in Sevvies – coz he's lovely and I love him! Ummmm Snape on a stick...Yummy._

**_Summary:_**_ Dark!Harry. (Slytherin)Harry finally realises he's not just a pawn in Dumbledore's game – but neither is he a pawn of Voldemort's. What he does control is his own life. He gets new friends, alliances and mentors, including finding a trusted friend and counsel in Professor Snape._

**_Pairing: _**_Thanks to all of you who helped with me this. But I have decided (with your help) that it will start of as **HP/SS** **FRIENDSHIP** but **WILL PROGRESS TO** **SLASH**. Although gradually. **HOWEVER IT WILL BE SLASH**. Sorry if this upsets anyone – but it might not be for a while. **You have been warned but I will continue to warn you!**_

_DM/HG – much later on though. Gotta get things established first haven't I?!? Hehe_

_Ok – I really, really apologise. I had writers block – which is EVIL! I've got this chapter out – FINALLY!! Yay me! I hope you like. Please enjoy! And thanks for all your reviews!! I have over 100 – that's fantastic!!! I can't thank you enough! As there are so many of them that if I say individual thanks I'll end up with the responses being longer than the chapter so I'll thank you collectively!! * Hands out lots of monopoly money* THANK YOU!!!! __J_

_Hasn't been BETA_ed because I've lost the email addresses to contact them. Damn._

_Enjoy!!!_

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**Chapter 8 – My Saving Grace**

They found him sitting in a secluded spot outside. He was leaning against a tree while the wind whipped around him and the sun pushed past the clouds. The leaves on the trees were in the process of changing their colours while the branches took part in an intricate dance to the sounds of nature. Aside from the soft rustling of the wind, everything was quiet and for that Harry was grateful. The silence was peaceful and invoked a sense of calm to his worn form. He was free. It was so hard to comprehend. Freedom. Years he had spent locked in a cupboard. Freedom. Sneaking food from the kitchen and doing homework late at night. Freedom. Cowering away from his uncles fists and hiding from Dudley's gang. Freedom. Something that most people take for granted, even though there are people in the world constantly fighting and dying for it. Freedom.

Harry's thoughts kept returning to the process of the trial. It seemed to all happen so fast. He looked again and again at every glance, every word, and every action – praying that it wasn't just some cruel dream. Snape's reactions surprised Harry the most. His quick changing attitudes and emotions were what really confused Harry. _' Do you realise you're not the only one?' _ It was Snape's face that showed Harry understanding, it was Snape who talked to him before the trial, it was Snape that accepting him into Slytherin and Snape who respected Harry.  And ultimately, Harry concluded, that it would be Snape who would save him from himself. 

Ron and Hermione were the ones who broke Harry out of his trance-like state. They had set out to find him shortly after the verdict. It was decided that they would stay at the school rather than go home since they would only be returning that evening. Besides, Harry would need them now.

"Alright mate?" asked Ron as he plonked himself unceremoniously next to Harry – while Hermione sat opposite them both. Only Hermione noticed Harry flinch and the question showed in her eyes. Harry ignored it and answered Ron's question.

"I'm fine, just a bit shocked really."

"That's understandable," replied Hermione. "Anything you want to talk about?"

" Thank you but not right now. I'm a bit overwhelmed, need to sort my head out first and just think for a bit." Harry replied quietly 

"Mind if we think with you?"

"It's a free country."

***

As Harry stared out at the lake his fears about how the school would react began to surface. He had handled their hatred and disproval before but the summer had changed him. Made him realise a few things. He realised that any person has power to use as they see fit. As long as people have the ability to think and change, then they can have an effect on everyone. As simple as a mood swing. He knew that this news could have a negative domino effect on the whole school. People talk and they only listen to what they want to hear. And thus facts get distorted and trust and friendship is severed. 

But giving up on humanity in its entirety means giving up the things you love. And in Harry's case that meant his friends and the family he had built up: Sirius, Remus, the Weasleys, Hermione and his professors. People he didn't want to lose. He turned to look at two of the most important people in his life.

"Thank you" he whispered.

***

The golden trio walked into the Great Hall with purpose. The first years had yet to be sorted – or indeed brought into the hall. They had yet to succumb to their fates or branded into some sort of stereotype. It pained Harry to know that by the end of the night those new first years would be categorised – like branded sheep. Weak friendships that were barely formed could be broken apart, parents hopes or pride could be tarnished, all because of an overage, scruffy hat.

The trio's entrance into the hall did not go unnoticed. As soon as the large oak doors gaped apart, heads swivelled in their direction. The school – as of yet – has not been informed of Harry's move to Slytherin. Dumbledore would announce that news before the first year sorting.   

"Alright mate?" whispered Ron, when he realised that they had the attention of everyone in the hall. "Because we better go sit down before the first years come in."

"You two go sit at Gryffindor. Dumbledore's going to make the announcement and then I'll have to sit with Slytherin." Answered Harry, loud enough so that only Ron and Hermione could hear. " I think this is going to be the hardest part. I think I overlooked just how intimidating the students can really be." Harry continued. _'This is for the best you'll see. Remember your reasons.'_

"Ok Harry. We'll see you tomorrow. Good luck and be careful. You'll always be our friend." Said Hermione, giving Harry a hug.

"She's right Harry. If you need us, you know where we are." Said Ron.

"Thanks guys. That means a lot. Go on – you better go and sit down before you get into trouble. I'll see you soon."

After Harry had waved them both of, he cautiously approached the head table. A thousand pairs of eyes fixed themselves on the figure as it walked the length of the room. Only one pair of eyes really looked into his soul. And before he could stop himself, Harry looked into those eyes. Snape understood – Harry figured that much and the funny jolt that he experienced earlier was spreading. Harry felt a need that he hadn't felt before. A need to be protected and cared for. He felt that he was drowning with all of those eyes on him – he felt suffocated under their gazes. And Snape was saving him.

"Hello Harry" greeted Dumbledore.

"Good evening Headmaster" replied Harry tearing his eyes away form his Head of House.

"Well let's get on with this," muttered Dumbledore to himself and then ready to address the crowd he began. "Greeting students, I hope you all had a pleasant summer, but before I call the first years in I have an announcement to make. Earlier this summer Harry Potter decided that he wished to be resorted into Slytherin. After talking with the appropriate persons I agreed to this request. Now Mr Potter has his own reasons for this decision, which I am not at liberty to tell you. I ask you all to treat him as you usually would. That is all. Thank you." Finished Dumbledore in a bored tone and took his place at the head table.

_'Hypocrite' _thought Harry. 

***

As soon as the feast was over Harry started making his way out of the hall with the rest of the students. After the sorting the students began to discuss what they had been told – only to be yelled at by Ron, Ginny and Hermione. Harry had to smile at their loyalty. The students through suspicious looks at him when they thought he wasn't looking. He had made it through the hard part but now the day's events were crashing around him and Harry felt crippled under the weight. He resolved to escape to his room as soon a possible. 

***

Harry was about to enter his rooms when he heard the voice behind him. He turned to face the boy he hated.

"So you chose Slytherin, Potter. Should we all congratulate you? Do you think we're all going to get on our knees and praise the all powerful boy-who-lived? You think this changes anything? Sneered Draco. 

"Actually no Malfoy. I simply don't want to lie to myself any longer. I am a Slytherin and you better get used to it because it isn't going to change. So I suggest you grow up – leave behind the bully act – the self-righteous git persona that you flaunt and get a life." Replied Harry. "I have had enough of being pushed and pulled by everyone who don't have a clue. You know nothing about my decisions or me, so don't act as if you do. I've had enough of your bullshit Malfoy. Grow up or piss off." And feeling immensely proud of himself, Harry walked into his rooms and shut the door on a very stunned Malfoy. 

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There you go – the aftermath and etc! I hope it was OK. Please tell me (but nicely tell me – please don't be mean or I will cry!) Arrrrgghhhh – I'm finding this so hard at the moment. I'm not finding much inspiration. I know what I want in the story; it's just the writing apart. Plus I have school and coursework and exams! So I'll update as much as I can. At least once every two weeks hopefully!

Thanks and remember to review (there's monopoly money in it for you. I can make you rich!! Hehe)

Love Dawn xxx


	9. Chapter 9: Cause and Effect

**_Disclaimer:_**_ OK, I say this now. I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER AND HIS UNIVERSE. All is J.K Rowlings. I'm only borrowing them for now – imprisoning them in little jars and controlling their every move. But don't worry I did put air holes in the jars... well not many in Voldemorts.... but a lot in Sevvies – coz he's lovely and I love him! Ummmm Snape on a stick...Yummy._

**_Summary:_**_ Dark!Harry. (Slytherin)Harry finally realises he's not just a pawn in Dumbledore's game – but neither is he a pawn of Voldemort's. What he does control is his own life. He gets new friends, alliances and mentors, including finding a trusted friend and counsel in Professor Snape._

**_Pairing: _**_Thanks to all of you who helped with me this. But I have decided (with your help) that it will start of as **HP/SS** **FRIENDSHIP** but **WILL PROGRESS TO** **SLASH**. Although gradually. **HOWEVER IT WILL BE SLASH**. Sorry if this upsets anyone – but it might not be for a while. **You have been warned but I will continue to warn you!**_

_DM/HG – much later on though. Gotta get things established first haven't I?!? Hehe_

A/N. I have a huge apology to make. It has taken me forever it get this chapter out and I am so sorry. With my life being as hectic as it is at the moment, I put the story to the back of my mind. I want to explain why I have taken so long, firstly of course was school, work, deadlines and exams which are extremely important. Secondly it was Christmas and New Year, and I obviously spent a lot of time with my family and friends and my boy friend all of whom kept me very busy. And thirdly my mother, a very close family friend and myself became ill. I'm ok now, it was nothing serious, however my mum had a cancer scare and our friend has been diagnosed with breast cancer. I'm not trying to evoke sympathy or pity, but I simply hope that you understand that life has gotten in the way. 

Anyway back to the reason I updated! I went and had a look at my stats info on my ff.net account and found that 22 people had added me to their author alerts and I suddenly had an overwhelming feeling of guilt – hence why it is 1:20am and I'm typing this! I hope this is ok, the ending I'm not too happy with, but I couldn't think of another way to phrase my ideas. The next chapter follows directly from this one and picks up the pace of the story a bit, I'm in the process of finishing it now and it should be posted this week (fingers crossed!)

I've tried to characterise the characters a close as possible to the books, as while looking at reviews I've received, I've noticed people tend to like how I write the characters – so yay me! Obviously there might be a bit OCC and I apologise – but I try to explain that in this chapter and explain it further in chapter 10.

I have 114 reviews! Yay!! Thank you so much for your wonderful comments and I love all of you. I took down my other story 'I don't wanna a miss a thing', due to poor writing and a thin plot and as soon as I make the necessary revisions I will post it again. Thank you everyone who has offered support for that story.

Other than that, I hope you enjoy the chapter and don't hate me too much! Please review and tell me your thoughts. Thank you, 

Love Dawn xxx J

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Chapter 9: Cause and Effect 

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As Harry walked into his room, he thought back on what he had just said to Malfoy and instantly regretted it. He had acted rash and hadn't thought about the consequences. The desire to show up his worst enemy, to stand up for himself and what he believed in overwhelmed his senses and took over. _'Damn' _Harry cursed to himself, _'that was bloody stupid'. _Of course the fact that he had stood up to Malfoy was a big bonus, and yes he was proud of how he held himself but the fact still remained that the consequences of his actions would not be good. He had been in Slytherin for a day, and instead of at least _trying _to tolerate them and try to peacefully co-exist with his fellow students, he had further ostracised himself from the entire Slytherin house, 

"Oh fuckwankbuggershittingarseheadandhole[1]" he said to himself as he changed in his nightclothes, while reliving his words and actions that evening. Tomorrow, he thought, would certainly prove interesting. He wanted to turn out his light but the room looked too big in the dark and he felt too vulnerable in it. He half expected (or hoped) to hear Neville's snores and Ron pestering him, but no sounds came. And as he eased himself into his overly large and soft bed, he couldn't help but feel utterly alone.

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It was 2am in the morning, and Harry, once again, was sitting outside by the lake. His clothes were wet from the grass and every now and then, when the wind blew through the trees, large droplets of water fell from the leaves and hit Harry on the head. But as Harry sat, he neglected to notice the cold around him and the silent figure that watched him from a distance, nor did he notice when the figure crept towards him and finally sat himself next to the desperate boy.

~*~*~*~*

Severus Snape sat inside his rooms, clutching a cup a black coffee, while he frantically wrote lesson plans that he had ignored to do during the summer, when the alarm that signalled a student was out of bed went off. Sighing in annoyance, the professor got dressed quickly and went in search of the student, silently promising himself that he would kill the bugger who pulled him away from his work.

After searching for what seemed like forever, the Head of Slytherin slowly made his way out into the chill of the early September morning. Scanning the grounds, his eyes noticed a black huddled blur in the distance, who even from such a gap, Snape recognised as Harry Potter. Damning the boy to hell, he strode of quickly into the boys direction, only slowing down when he noticed the boy's form. He looked tired and thin and old. He looked hurt and sad and frail, and suddenly all those years of stored hatred for the boy, even after their sort-of truce, evaporated. All Snape saw in front of him, was a student – _his _student, _his _responsibility and someone in dire need of help. Knowing something and refusing to act, Snape realised, was so intensely different from seeing what you know. Yes, he had supported the boy, and yes, he had talked to him and yes, he had promised to help, but this was not something that Snape could fix by brewing a potion. Yes, it required love and comfort but most of all, it required the ability to simply _be there_ and make his presence known, even if it wasn't appreciated. These were qualities that Snape didn't show often. He had trained his body and his mind to reject all emotion, to forget, to encase his heart in ice and never let his guard down in public. The habit of playing the 'cold hearted death eater persona', Snape realised would have to be dropped if he expected to help Harry at all. It would take time and patience to build up any sort of friendship and trust and under normal circumstances Snape would walk away and brush of any responsibility, but this was different. Maybe because it was Harry Potter, or maybe it was because he recognised himself in the depressed boy, but either way he resolved to help, in anyway he could.

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Harry jumped when he felt Professor Snape sit down beside him, he still wasn't used to people being so close. He felt his heart speed up, his breathing quicken, his body was prepared itself to run – to escape from pain. Flashes on the past raced through his mind and he felt himself stiffen up and close his eyes when he heard his name being said. _"Harry…Harry…Harry can you hear me? I'm not going to hurt you… Harry…answer me…"_

The words burrowed in his mind and penetrated his brain, like worms digging in the ground. He sought out the source of the voice, he wished so much to believe it, he wanted to listen – but he couldn't remember. The world was spinning – truth and lies and pain and hurt and the cold and the heat all intermingled and he didn't know the truth and didn't know what to trust. He welcomed the blackness when it came, he succumbed to its depths and let the darkness wrap itself around his body and consume him whole. 

Snape instantly noticed when the boy passed out, and offering a silent plea of help to God, he picked up the fallen child and carried him into his rooms.

~*~*~*~*

Harry woke up quickly to light, in a place he didn't recognise. The room that he was in was large and he was laying in a four poster draped in black and dark blue fabrics. Instantly his body reacted to the idea of danger but when he tried to move, his body wouldn't respond to his commands. He was desperately trying to flee, when the door to the room opened and Professor Snape entered.

"Good morning Harry. You're in my private rooms and quite safe I assure you. I found you outside by the lake, however you did not take my intrusion well and passed out. I thought it would be appropriate to bring you here, instead of the hospital wing where you would be forced to answer endless questions by people who don't understand." Snape stated quietly, stopping only to check Harry's reaction. Seeing that he was being listened to, he continued, "The reason you cannot move, is because of me in an effort to ensure your safety when you woke up. I didn't want you to panic and run out before we had a chance to talk. But now that you are up and awake, I will remove the spell."

"Thank you professor. What time is it?" asked Harry quietly after the spell had been removed. He was embarrassed that he had showed such weakness in front of his professor.

"It's 4:30 in the morning. If you are up to it, I suggest you get out of my bed and join me in the lounge, where I think it's time we had a talk." Responded Snape, who quickly turned and left the room.

Gathering his thoughts and taking a deep breath, ready to pour out excuse after excuse, he went to meet Snape. 

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End Chapter 9.

1-From 'Love Actually' – I think it's brilliant!! 

So there you have it. What did you think? Please tell me! I know it's not great but I desperately wanted to give you all something to read. My next chapter will be out very shortly and will properly be a lot longer than this one!

Oh by the way, can't you just see Snape procrastinating and not doing his lesson plans? I imagine him standing over his cauldron, desperately trying to forget the words 'children' and 'teaching' until he can't put it off any longer! Ummm – that might just be me!

Talk to you all soon review and I'll give you monopoly money (waggles eyebrows- hehe). THANK YOU!

Love Dawn xxx

  


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[1] Love Actually!


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